So, I’ve been quiet for a few days; work has been a touch busy, I have been catching up with studies and reading the books which I have been meaning to read for a while. I have been a little too busy to catch up and comment on everyones posts, and hopefully I can do this over the next week or so.
In the meantime, for those who don’t follow me on twitter, I have some news to share! (No, i’m not pregnant!)
Over the last few days, I have found a new home for this blog – yes, we’re moving! The blog is going to get a new domain – I will post further details soon. I am trying to sort out the layout on the new space, and hopefully will migrate the posts, your comments, setup new pages, and widgets etc in the comming days. What this means is that I will probably not post for a handful of days, however, I have a crackerjack of a post coming up for you guys which is titled – An interview with the Doctor.
As a blog house warming party, I’m open to suggestions for 5 guest posts! The theme – “Memories” (good or bad). I will post the 5 guest posts anonymously, and will appear in March ‘09.
Everyone is welcome to join in – just email me your post and I will schedule it to be published.
It’s been a pretty rough week… one of those where you take a step back and think to yourself – “wow! didn’t see that one coming!”. All week, I was up by 5am, so that I was out of the door, and at work by 730 am. I think its fair to say that physically it was very draining too.
On Tuesday night, as I headed to bed, I decided to restart my blackberry because it seemed a little slow. As I lay in bed, my face turned the same colour as the screen on the BB…. it was displaying the white screen of death. My attempts to revive it were futile, and it meant one and one thing only – I had to reinstall it (darn! important numbers were lost!). So as I hooked the BB to my PC, and got online to find the drivers, I got talking to my buddy HFM. Our conversation was hovering around a situation which she was having with a friend of hers. As we discussed further and further, my mind drifted back to something which I had put together a long while back, but never actually posted.
I was going through a phase not too long ago, when I was questioning everything associated with me. A huge question which I kept asking myself was “Who is a friend? What is a friend?” I keep thinking about this, and as HFM and I spoke more and more this week, it started to get a little clearer.
I am generally a very private person. Sure, I throw stuff around this blog, and I tweet as if its the unpolluted air that I desire, but it’s not even close to what my thoughts are. So, who do I share these thoughts with? Friends right? Well, that’s what I thought too… but I don’t know…. You see, my definition of a friend is someone who I can trust with my life. Someone who is there for me without me having to look for them. A friend is one who doesn’t care about the pleases and sorrys and thanks, because the connection between 2 friends is greater than that. But is that really friendship? I ask that because that is what YOU expect from another person… but would you give back the same too? And if you didn’t – does that make you less of a friend? Does it make you an associate and not a friend at all?
I love to keep things simple in life. Life is a battle on a daily basis, some of which you win, and some which you lose. What you don’t want though is battles with or amongst your friends. I think of friends as those who I can be there for, and those who are their for me; it doesn’t have to be in the worst circumstance, it’s just assuring to know that they are there!
On Tuesday night, HFM and MaliZOMG hung around and kept company which, to a large extent, made me feel sooooo much better; after a hard/bad day at work, nightmare day dealing with clients, trying to get stupid colleagues to do their job, and then finally as I was close to drifting off, a phone which needed resuscitation it was nice to know that 2 people just gave a crap. I slept for 4 hours that night, but I slept in the knowledge that I had 2 good friends who were there for me when I didn’t quite call out to either of them.
The same goes to everyone who comments or tweets or helps me or encourages me when I need it the most, but don’t quite talk about it – that is friendship; the pure fact that I know there are people who care enough to well… care! On my part – I have been less of a friend to a lot of people for a long time…. hopefully that change has begun, and will continue in the future.
One thing which I love about the Internet is the fact that you can make good, reliable, and great friends without ever meeting them in person. Given the opportunity, I would love to meet every one of them – from Salta in Argentina to Melbourne in Australia, St Petersburg in Russia to Chengdu in China. I love the friends which I have made in all walks of life – school, uni, work, chatting online, tweeting, blogging and ofcourse – travelling!
Friendship begins by offering what YOU have to give, and not what someone else is willing to give to you; so with that in mind – do you have what it takes to be a good friend?
I don’t swear, I really don’t… but I am absolutely confused at the moment. My brain feels like a magic 8 ball at an uncertain circumstances conference.
On a monthly basis, I get a call from a headhunter/recruiter asking me “are you sure you don’t want to move?”. He actually has forwarded me details and opportunities of major companies who are interested in people who do stuff that I do. I know and relate to a lot of these companies, and have actually interviewed with a couple, but it just doesn’t seem to be the right time to switch jobs. Today, he came to me with a job opportunity in Abu Dhabi with a confirmed interview whenever I want one. Sounds good right? Here’s why it’s a bitch….
I wrote yesterday about the wedding that I attended at the weekend. What I did not talk about was what actually went down there. I was seated opposite some guy I didn’t know, and we kicked off our conversation with him attempting a joke, and me responding with a punchline. We both laughed – the ice was broken. Over the next two and a half hours we had wide ranging conversations (without actually knowing who each of us were); he introduced me to his mom, wife and daughter. We had a conversation of how it was a bad time to switch jobs to the Middle East (which his daughter was offered for a year, but the opportunity fell through). My mom was elsewhere, and when she came by our table, it turns out that the guy and mom were classmates. The guy and I also had conversations on a personal level, and he was literally grilling me of my past, of what my plans were for the future; he almost asked me my version of the meaning of life. The question at which we swapped details were on the lines of – “Are you single/available?”. From the corner of my eye I could see my dad having one of those smiles on his face which read – there is a plan to be hatched here. When I got mingling with people a little while later, an aunt of mine kept dragging me and introducing me to random people…. on my way home the penny finally dropped on WHY she was introducing me… (I am blonde around the edges ). But what does this have to do with the first bit?… well, besides the bad time to take up a job in the ME bit….
The last 8 months have been terribly hard for me. It’s the first time in 6 years that I am actually alone or not with a significant other. I miss having that someone to speak to; there is a little something else which a better half brings which maybe the best of friends cannot. Whats adding to this frustration is the daily anxiety which I face at work…
For the last ten days or so, I have been madly frustrated with things at work. We have a strategic team at work who seem to be totally off the ball. Yesterday morning, I had a HUGE rant at my boss. I put in front of him evidence of poor performance and decision making coming from that entire team of 5, and also pointed to him instances of where clients were actually complaining back or were airing their frustrations. My boss supposedly had a word with their team leader…. and guess what… I found 4 more instances of screw-ups today – DONE TODAY!! I was seething… really really really boiling; I showed it to my boss who said that he was going to deal with it. The point is – I have been raising these things for the last 6 months, but nothing seems to be changing. Circumstances like these lead to people changing jobs.
Which brings me to this guy who calls me on a monthly basis….
MaliZOMG asked earlier on twitter – how does everyone else let off steam…. my response – I blog.
This is how clouded my head is at the moment. At any other time since I started working, I would pounce at the opportunities which I am being offered. People have been on my case since 2004 to get settled down, and although I can manage their persistent efforts, I for the first time feel lonesome… and I am the type of person who doesn’t do solo… so it’s killing me. For 6 weeks, I held on to my resolution of not complaining about the work of other people, but I cannot keep shush when people are just not doing what they should do – everyone has a job to do exactly that – so that they perform for the company; I am not asking everyone to work at 100% all the time, I can do with 60% with consistency… but it’s not happening.
So, yesterday started bright and early (too early for my liking since I had had only about 3.5-4 hours of sleep)… we were heading up north for the wedding of AS. Now, AS and I have a little bit of history, and he may not necessarily be my favouritest person in the world; let me tell you the whole story….
In 1998, when I moved over from Dubai, U.A.E to Birmingham, UK, I moved in with my Mom’s sister while I attended school and then university in Brum. At the same time, AS moved in with us as well – AS is my uncle’s (said aunts husband) nephew. AS was a couple of years younger than me, and was starting an important 2 years of schooling life (GCSE) – kinda same as me (A-levels).
AS is one of those guys who very easily gets influenced by friends; he consistently got into trouble at school and outside, and as smart as he was, never gave 2 hoots about school. All he cared about was his friends, and flashy gear. AS was a pretty screwed up kid, and there were reasons for it – his mother (my uncles sister) divorced her husband and married someone out of religion, which caused a lot of friction in the family. Turns out – she’s divorced that guy too. Part of AS getting screwed up is the role of his mother; you have to be SOME person when you let your 15/16 year old daughter have a live in 21 year old “boyfriend”. Whatever you say – that’s just WRONG!
AS’s father is a good friend of mine. I met him randomly a long time ago, and we kinda kept in touch and eventually because good friends. Did I mention – most of my best friends are older than me? I think MalizOMG may be the only youngest best buddy… maybe one or two others
In the 2.5 years which AS and I spent in the same household, I was badly affected by his actions. His actions were never directed at me, but his actions resulted in curfews and bans in the house which had to apply to both of us (so that the situation was fair). There were times, when I tried to help him out (or so I thought) by throwing away his hidden cigarette packets, but ofcourse, you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.
As the years rolled on, AS was no longer part of the picture. He skipped education, got into trouble with the law, and I guess learned the hard way that life is more than a bitch – it is cruel, sadistic, and harsh if you don’t approach it the right way. At the same time, I got closer to his dad, and for a certain period of time worked for him doing market research for his business. I also get on very very well with AS’s step mom – she is a genuinely nice person.
So, when I found out a few weeks ago that AS was getting married, I was kinda happy for him, but knowing his family situation (his mom’s side and dad – they umm… hate each other) I was hoping that I wouldn’t have to attend the wedding – it would be just awkward (I get on well with both sides *DOH*). I also was thinking of the past; I’m not one to hold on to grudges, but AS’s actions affected me a lot as I grew up, and there was always some negative feeling towards him. However, his dad and step mom insisted that I attend, and I like them too much as people to have avoided the proceedings.
The wedding itself went well, smoothly, and both parties with issues stayed in their corners and enjoyed the wedding in their own right. I saw AS for the first time since 2003-2004, and it was nice to hear something very unexpected from him – he told me “I’m so glad you made it”. I hope he meant it sincerely.
I guess sometimes, taking that step up in life changes a person, and I hope the new responsibility does bring in the change not only in him, but also within the people around him. I don’t think AS’s families can find a middle ground in their divided situation (too many egos involved), but I hope for the sake of the newly married couple they hold back their differences and let them live a new and happy life.
It was a pleasure visiting and meeting you folk last week! It was my first ever trip on your shores, and although it was a business trip, I thoroughly enjoyed my stay.
On Tuesday, as we (my boss and a director) started our journey in freezing cold London, I had a sense of nervousness in me. I was travelling to train clients (solo) for the first time, and the hundred million questions in my head just would not stop. Part of the distraction from my nerves, before we boarded the flight was the chance to spend time in the Executive Lounge – another first for me!
So as we waited in the exec lounge, I noticed a small little device on the tarmac, which could only be used in a sling shot surely…. turns out – it was our plane. I dont think I have travelled in something so small before – (capacity – 44 passengers, and 4 crew in total). The lane was so small, that it had steps built into the exit doors!
Eventually we boarded, the pilot wound the side jack, and kick started the 225 miles journey to the tiny island of Guernsey. When we landed about 45 minutes later, I got a nice big shock when i saw the airport…. it was a porter cabin! A slightly elongated one… but none the less a porter cabin!
(The airport is the ground floor – and yes, thats the whole airport!)
We got off the plane and into the cab in less than 2 minutes (literally); it’s quite funny how short the walk was, and how I wish every airport was like this! After a fairly uneventful cab ride to the hotel, we were all tired, and hit the sack pretty soon that night.
Tuesday morning started before 7 (because of the location), and the first thing which popped into my mind was to take pics! The enterance of the Hotel was quite nice, and later on in the day I found out that Guernsey doesnt quite have the multi storey hotel complexes. Everything is built into the hills, or is a conversion of old town houses.
Breakfast was had, and I began my journey to the client offices. The first thing which I noticed when I stepped out of the hotel at 9am was how much warmer Guernsey was compared to London; the temperature must have been atleast double digits – which would have been awesome if I was outdoors!
The clients office was near the marina, so I was excited about lunch time and surely as soon as it was time, I was out of the door and made my way to the marina. There is something about water which attracts me to it. The effect is the same as the ring and everybody else in Lord of the Rings. I love water, will get into it, but then suffer panic attacks in shallow water. That sucks!
The 2 days ended up being great, and the training sessions were very productive. There is a trait which I always try to associate with myself – thinking on my feet, having an answer when it is required; I have been questioning this of recently because I have hardly been tested in the last few months. So when I was faced with a barage of questions during the training, it was good to know that once the dust was blown off, the trait is very alive for sure!
People of Guernsey – let me tell you what I loved about you and your island.
In the 2 days, which I spent on your tiny island, I loved the fact that Guernsey feels like a village. I loved the long winding roads, going up and down. I loved the fact that the roads are so narrow that you have to mount the pavement to pass in so many places. The best thing about Guernsey was the fact that almost every person I walked past, smilled, nodded, or said “hi!”. People were cheery, and the cabbies were the best! I love the fact that life is simple in Guernsey, and there is a sense of communityamongst the 70 odd thousand people on the island.
Spending time in Guernsey also reminded me of the desire in me to travel; but I can’t do it alone. I spent time catching up on reading (Jimmy Carter – Palestine Peace not Apartheid – Check my reads in 2009 for more details ); I havent read a book in a fair while now, so it was good to catch up again.
More than anything, I realised from my trip to Guernsey (yes, I know, it was only Guernsey!) that I get a chance to travel because of my job…. I don’t know how many people get a chance to do that – and I am thankful for it!
Leaving Guernsey wasn’t the most pleasant experience. The airport staff were first very anal about my toiletries. They wanted me to carry only one clear plastic bag; they couldnt care less that I travelled into Guernsey with 2. Idiots. I had to throw away some stuff. Worse still, the woman in front of me had to throw away half her make up. She wasnt pleased! I got into the waiting area, and my first thoughts were – am I in the right place? the reason for this? Well, why dont you have a look of the end to end plan!
I landed safely in cold cold London. By the time I had commuted between Gatwick and home, it had begun to snow and settle – far cry from the double digits which I felt in Guernsey.
A wicked trip none the less, and would reccomend it to anyone as a weekend away trip!
Hmm… so this is the second time I am having to type up this post. The original post got wiped out while wordpress was saving. Great!
First up on the getting organised agenda is blogging. I absolutely love reading blogs, and ever since I have started writing, the enjoyment factor has increased substancially. However, of late, I am able to catchup on reading only at the weekends, by which time the number of posts in my reader are pushing 6-800 (I do have about a hundred people whose blogs I follow). I love spending time on a post and leaving comments and following up where I can, but obviously its almost damned impossible with this many posts. The solution to this? I have slashed off the number of posts which I am going to follow down to 55. Out go a lot of the inactive/low frequency bloggers, as well as the people who blog about what they are watching on TV or blog one line sentences 5 times a day. I have twitter for that! If I should be following you on twitter – then let me know! Hopefully, I can keep the number of blogs down to this number.
Next on the agenda – my Blackberry.
<Speaks to himself>
Dude! You got the BB to get organised! Sure you’re now on top of emails, and are actually getting back to people when you tell them you will – this is super; but how about using the calender, tasks and reminder facilites on the phone instead of scribling on your palm, arm and god knows where else?
</Speaks to himself>
I also need to get on top of my self study course. Of recently, I have been getting involved in blogging and tweeting and have been neglecting my studies. I think I will have to book an exam date to get myself focused and prepared for this exam. A time table would also be helpful.
Another thing which I want to do is catch up on other reading. I have started and stopped reading 3 books in the last 2 months. I need to spend more time reading good and proper literature. You can track the books which I am/will be reading here.
Which also brings me to exercise. I havent played squash for a couple of weeks, and need to get back to a routine. I also havent worked on my situps program for a week, which would mean I will stuggle in my fourth week. Gotta get back to getting in shape. I wonder if I can make it this cricket season? I will lose half a season to Ramadan, and the other half – well who knows. My club plays their matches on the grounds on the Alexandra Palace in North London.
I also want to get involved in social networking events like Twestival – which is taking place worldwide on 12th of February 2009. Although I had tickets for the event, I wont be attending because of work commitments. Saying that, I am really considering attending the 20 something bloggers ultimate meetup in Chicago in June 2009. I think it would be pretty darn interesting, and I will get to visit the US of A.
Speaking of which – I need to figure out where I want to go on holiday. I went to Dubai last year, but it wasnt quite a holiday (sorry MaliZOMG), and more like a recovery from a bad personal event. My last propper break was in February 2007, when I went to Turkey, and I could really do with getting away from the daily grind. My choices for this year… well, it’s a poll! I have never been State-side and I would love to do a mini tour; the cities on my radar are Houston, NYC, DC, Chicago, Boston, and Toronto (I know thats in Canada!). The alternative is 2 weeks in Goa, India – with a couple of days in and around Mumbai. Orrrr…. I could go elsewhere… where would you suggest? I am looking to travel either late in June/ Early July, or sometime late in September.
an appropriate or favorable time or occasion: Their meeting afforded an opportunity to exchange views.
2.
a situation or condition favorable for attainment of a goal.
3.
a good position, chance, or prospect, as for advancement or success.
From time to time, I go through phases where I question certain topics a great deal. Opportunity is one of those “subjects” which I constantly talk about. I question opportunities available to everyone, and how people can, do and don’t capitalise what is available to them. There are a lot of issues which I think about at the moment, and they somehow seem to link themself to opportunity.
I was thinking about one of my earliest memories recently. My junior school was located miles into the desert. My daily journey started at 0630 am, when I was the first person to board the bus. It was late 1988, I had turned 6, and I couldn’t miss the school bus in the morning. There was no alternative transportation, so it’s fair to say – there was no pressure on me to sort myself out everyday morning to get to school, a journey which took almost an hour and a half each way. Did I mention that it gets hot in the desert? So when I had the opportunity in 1994 to join a school within the city limits, I grabbed that opportunity. I was 12, and as much as I loved my friends, I had that instinctive desire to change my current situation; one which I obviously didn’t enjoy. Somehow, I’d like to think that I grabbed my opportunity at that young age; ofcourse my parents made some decisions, but I was actually given a choice of where I wanted to go. I think I chose wisely.
Fast forward a few years, I had graduated from university, and I had 2 job offers on the table. One was from a Japanese-German IT vendor, and the other was from a small Swiss-Pakistani bank. I chose the smaller company because the opportunity to learn and establish myself was far greater here; I knew I could somehow learn more, and since moving on from there, I know that it was an opportunity well utilised.
Those are 2 examples, from my life, of opportunities which I was presented with, and how I took them. But that’s not what I wanted to talk about in this post. I want to talk about the opportunites which affect others. Opportunities which affect my friends, and some which affect people who I work with. Why?…. Well, I believe in sharing the love, sharing experience, learning from others, and try and help others learn from what I have been through myself. It’s my way of contributing to life.
So where do I start? Well, how about with someone who was very close to me. The question I always asked you was why did you fight against opportunities which would help broaden your horizon, help you achieve your dreams, improve your lifestyle to how you always wanted it to be?
I wonder if the current ceasefire in Gaza is an opportunity for everyone worldwide to put in that little effort in helping raise awareness of the conflict in the region, and to try and help people on both sides to accept each other and try and live in peace.
With the current global financial crisis, can we do something simple like help people all around the world have access to clean water? We have the opportunity to help those in need, and anything we do – small or large, is a great enough contribution.
Sometimes, we wish for opportunities, dream about these, but they seem so hard to come by. Such is the situation of a friend of mine. As hard as she is working, hoping, and improving herself, the lack of a single and simple opportunity is holding her back from achieving a dream.
But then there are others who have the opportunities but just do not want to recognise it… as clearly as you stick it in front of their face.
In the company where I currently work, I have an idea of what it takes to move up the ladder; it’s something which I have done effectively, and would love it if I could help others achieve as well.There are a couple of guys at work who show promise from time to time; this was recognised early by the people who can influence or make decisions. However, the one thing lacking at work is the guidance or motivation on how you can jump up a level; sometimes this is required for people of my age.
The issue with these people isn’t the fact that there isn’t anyone trying to push them, a bunch of us actually want them to step up to the plate and raise their game, perform confidently and consistently above their comfort level, essentially prove to the company that they can consistently bring their “A-game” to the show and seize that opportunity to climb up a level. But it seems that they “don’t want to”; that they are “happy” with what they have. I know its a strong statement to make, but there is no other way of explaining their behaviour. A number of you readers work, some of you in large organizations, and others in not so big ones; so I guess you will understand essence of grabbing the opportunity when you ae presented with it in a work environment. Is it fair to complain about your job if you don’t want to step out of your comfort zone?
Forget about a job, is it fair to complain or object to anything in life if you don’t want to cross a barrier based on your own decisions? How do you move forward in life without taking the next step?
I don’t know about others, but I believe that when you are younger, you have a greater opportunity to do things, to achieve things compared to later on in life. I hope it isn’t a naive view, but as a 26 year old I feel that I have a reasonably mature view of how life turned out over the last 10 years, and how it could go in the next 10. Stepping up to the plate to face the music if not what everyone is cut out to do. Every person paces their life differently, and achievements come at different stages in each ones life. But one thing which will constantly appear in life is opportunity. It wont appear only once…. opportunities will knock your door on a daily basis…..
What is important to know is – will you see an opportunity when it comes, and then will you have the strength to grab it with both hands?
This post is dedicated to each end everyone of you – especially the younger readers….
I’m a little under the weather, so I will share a couple of awards with you readers which I “won” last month.
My first award was the Lemonade, which was presented to me by Antonella from the STUPIDEST corner of my mind. I received this award because I deal with topics with a certain attitude. One instance of this can be seen here.
The concept of this award is to
1. Thank the person who was so thoughtful for giving you this award by linking their blog to this post. (Mucho Thanksies Anto)
2. Put the logo on your blog or post. (….check)
3. Nominate 10 blogs which show great attitude/gratitude. (….ummm I’ll do 5)
4. Link your nominees to your post.
5. Comment them to tell them about the award they’ve won.
Right, so here they are… (and I shall be counting in Arabic… because I am learning arabic (but I knew to count already))
Wahid) MaliZOMG – Blogging is all about passion, and this guy does it with attitude – thats a lethal combo!
Ithnayn) Mars – I love honest writing… I love reading about real life issues, and I get my fix over at Mars’.
Thalatha) Mona – When you talk about passion, you talk about Mona. Everything is attitude, and standing up for what you believe is right. Rebellious Arab Girl is one of my favourite blogs because of the style and “anger” in the writing.
Arba-a) Falak – I like this blog because of the giggle factor. It reminds me of myself behaving in the same random ways 10 years ago.
Khamsah) Katherine because I feel that she is inspirational to young people, trying to get through the battles of day to day life, doing what she does.
I thank you Anto for picking me on number 7 on your list…. it is my luck number, and I feel privileged!
The second award which I received recently was the Honest Scrap award, which I received from MY over at For the Love of Life
The “rules” for this award are:
1) Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.
2) Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with “Honest Scrap.”
3) List at least 10 honest things about yourself.
10 honest things…… (oh dear……)
a) I try and be logical when sometimes I should be emotional.
b) I will have an opinion on anything and everything.
c) Most of my friendships have been formed because of my reliability.
d) I always used to think that I would have issues with commitment in a relationship. Turns out, I over committed in my last one.
e) I constantly try and bring out the best in a person; I feel the need to motivate anyone and everyone.
f) I love eating, I will dip my fingers into anything.
g) I feel at home with people from different cultures and regions.
h) My inquisitive nature will get me into trouble one day. One person should not be allowed to ask this many questions!
i) My style is to shock and awe… it’s the rebel in me which brings out the “dark side”…
j) I selected the title of my blog based on one of my beliefs in life – anything and everything seems simple in life…. until you get down to actually do it… to put the biscuit in the basket.
As for the nominations… well, I will nominate the same 5 people above, plus Freshly Squeezed because she gives me a genuine reason to wear my shades indoors, and Minus 1 thousand because I enjoy her pics, and recipes! Did I mention I love eating?
Shukran MY for nominating me, and for understanding what my blog name meant!
In between the snow post and the 7Pi7D finale post, there was an additional post by MY who lives over at For the Love of Life. Her post went live earlier today; do have a read and let her know of your comments.
Breakfast was had, and I began my journey to the client offices. The first thing which I noticed when I stepped out of the hotel at 9am was how much warmer Guernsey was compared to London; the temperature must have been atleast double digits – which would have been awesome if I was outdoors! 
The 2 days ended up being great, and the training sessions were very productive. There is a trait which I always try to associate with myself – thinking on my feet, having an answer when it is required; I have been questioning this of recently because I have hardly been tested in the last few months. So when I was faced with a barage of questions during the training, it was good to know that once the dust was blown off, the trait is very alive for sure!
